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Wrap your hands,
Around my neck,

Force me,
Down to my knees,

Mush my mouth,
Against concrete.

Tell me that you love me,
Pretty-Please.

Push me,
Make me fall.

Bruise me as I bawl,
Just love me.

Hurt me,
Endanger me.

Tie me up,
Throw me down.

Just hurt me,
'Till;

I can't breathe.
I'm weird.....I know. W/e though<3
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:iconwinx-cute-girls:
Winx-Cute-Girls Featured By Owner Jun 18, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
we 're both weird.....
Reply
:iconeyeofhavoc:
EyeOfHavoc Featured By Owner Jun 20, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Embrace it:heart:
Reply
:iconinsomniaplague:
insomniaplague Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
May I say, I love your usage of bold/italics. As I read it, italics come out as a cry, a whisper, a whimper, etc. while bolded phrases are commands, or rise in desperation. It really creates an interesting effect, especially with the play of normal font that makes sure the lines keep that emphasis. (Because if it was all italic/bold, it wouldn’t really stand out or make a difference, you know?) And then the climax of the poem: “I can’t breathe” with both font types? Nice planning there.
Anyways, this is a great display of those masochistic-esque emotions that involve love & lust. The contradictions are painfully understandable—relatable, on one level or another, for most of us. The interesting thing about this poem is that it can really be interpreted differently. When taken literally, this is a rather dark poem with some self-abusive themes. However, with that said, the rawness of the emotion is almost alarming, and I can't help but take this as something inward...physical pain manifested from an emotion.
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:iconeyeofhavoc:
EyeOfHavoc Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Wow. Thank you:heart:
Reply
:iconinsomniaplague:
insomniaplague Featured By Owner Apr 21, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I only wrote what I thought. :3
Reply
:iconeyeofhavoc:
EyeOfHavoc Featured By Owner Apr 21, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you<3
Reply
:iconnearlyinvisiblemind:
NearlyInvisibleMind Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
This is great!
Reply
:iconeyeofhavoc:
EyeOfHavoc Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you<3
Reply
:iconricardo-orozco:
Ricardo-Orozco Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
im weird too<3 :) I like this one!
Reply
:iconeyeofhavoc:
EyeOfHavoc Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Lol, thank you:heart:
Reply
:iconlittlemouse015:
littlemouse015 Featured By Owner Apr 26, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I really love the mixture of emotion: the hurt, the lust, the need, the desperation, the willingness, the reluctance. The poison in the words, the seduction. Such a boiling kettle of contradictions. So endlessly deep. If you read and read it over and read it over again you find another meaning and piece of soul.
"I can't breathe." You're last line is beautifully powerful. It encompasses all of the emotions poured out. The pressure, and yet the hope.
I also like the originality of the variations of italic, bold, and small. It adds a lot of stress to some things and naturally makes you dig deep with the smaller print. Thinking, "I gotta read the smaller lines, too," and you really analyze things.
This is going to sound wierd, but I think on the lines, "Bruise me as I bawl, Just love me." I think you should make the "Just love me" the line in bold, because I find it to be almost the most striking part of the poem. But then again, I don't know if you have any rhyme or reason to the differences in text. If you do, this is simply my opinion given in all due respect.
All of the lines in the poem are almost perfectly executed. Not too much repetition, all with significant worth, etc.
Thanks for the intriguing read.
Reply
:iconeyeofhavoc:
EyeOfHavoc Featured By Owner Apr 26, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Oh my goodness, thank you:heart:

And for the bolding and such...'I love you' isn't bolded because it's like a plead to be accepted..Not a command. I tried it the other way before posting it a it didn't look right to me..Or it didn't match what I felt personally.<3
Reply
:iconlittlemouse015:
littlemouse015 Featured By Owner Apr 26, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
You're welcome :D
Oh yeah, I see that. Your interpretation makes more sense.
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:iconeyeofhavoc:
EyeOfHavoc Featured By Owner Apr 26, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
:heart:
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:iconlittlemouse015:
littlemouse015 Featured By Owner Apr 26, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I guess it's all in how the reader interprets it first. I tend to form my own opinion on things and then get the artist's opinion. It's interesting to see the the differences and similarities.
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:iconeyeofhavoc:
EyeOfHavoc Featured By Owner Apr 26, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
I know right<3
Like..I have a poem on here somewhere about point of views and such. I think it is called 'Jude My Cover', but I'm not sure...It's about bullying as well. I wrote it for a big project at school.
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:iconlittlemouse015:
littlemouse015 Featured By Owner Apr 26, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I'll check it out!
Reply
:iconeyeofhavoc:
EyeOfHavoc Featured By Owner Apr 26, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
*cheers*
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconariensmith:
ArienSmith Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2011  Professional Traditional Artist
Nice! A little bit of BDSM, but I really like it...very expressive!
Reply
:iconeyeofhavoc:
EyeOfHavoc Featured By Owner Apr 21, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you<3
What is BDSM?
Reply
:iconariensmith:
ArienSmith Featured By Owner Apr 21, 2011  Professional Traditional Artist
You're welcome.

Um, do you know what S&M is...like in Rihanna's song? Sadism/masochism. It's kind of hard to explain...XD
Reply
:iconeyeofhavoc:
EyeOfHavoc Featured By Owner Apr 21, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
I don't really listen to Rihanna lol so not really<3
Do you mean..Hm... Like, wanting love..Damn, Idk. >.<
Just explain it how you think it is and I can try to understand..?
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:icondominamoon:
DominaMoon Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2011   General Artist
Omg I love this!
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:iconeyeofhavoc:
EyeOfHavoc Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Haha, thank you<3 lol
Reply
:iconwetheinvisible:
WeTheInvisible Featured By Owner Apr 10, 2011
I actually really love this. x]
KINKY ABUSE WTF. :']
xoje.
Reply
:iconeyeofhavoc:
EyeOfHavoc Featured By Owner Apr 11, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Haha^^ thank you hun<3
Reply
:iconkaintheavenger:
kaintheavenger Featured By Owner Apr 7, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Whoa..........where'd that come from???
Reply
:iconeyeofhavoc:
EyeOfHavoc Featured By Owner Apr 8, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Lol....I was......
....yah.
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:iconkaintheavenger:
kaintheavenger Featured By Owner Apr 8, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
On some hardcore stuff these days...Don't worry i can at times too.
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:iconeyeofhavoc:
EyeOfHavoc Featured By Owner Apr 9, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Lol<3
Reply
:iconjaxkels:
JaxkelS Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011
One thing that keep popping in my mind while reading this...

Masochism... and I just remembered what it's called
Reply
:iconeyeofhavoc:
EyeOfHavoc Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
What does that mean silly?
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:iconjaxkels:
JaxkelS Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011
It means getting pleasure from being hurt.
Reply
:iconeyeofhavoc:
EyeOfHavoc Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Awesome.^^
I like that word<3
Reply
:iconjaxkels:
JaxkelS Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011
yup, but don't like it too much.
Reply
:iconeyeofhavoc:
EyeOfHavoc Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Why is that?
Reply
:iconjaxkels:
JaxkelS Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011
we can just say that... it kills? (obsessed with the word that you live it)

anyway... that's it I guess.
Reply
:iconeyeofhavoc:
EyeOfHavoc Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
That's only if you go beyond your limit<3
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(1 Reply)
:iconkane-blackthorn:
Kane-Blackthorn Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011  Student Writer
this is really good and give off the really creepy image, I like it. ^_^
What brought you to write this if i may ask?
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:iconeyeofhavoc:
EyeOfHavoc Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
I was in a frustrating mood lol
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:iconkane-blackthorn:
Kane-Blackthorn Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011  Student Writer
Fair enough XD I get that alot when writing...
Reply
:iconeyeofhavoc:
EyeOfHavoc Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Ah. I donno if you know what I mean. Lol, I wanted to be touched and such but I couldn't...because he wasn't there.:blush:
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:iconkane-blackthorn:
Kane-Blackthorn Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011  Student Writer
Ah...one of THOSE moments, yes I do know.
I'm currently in a room with four three year olds with my girlfriend (they're her younger sisters) her mom, grandmother and her aunt and I;m really really well...in the mood and she's sitting there in a low cut dress...I know how you feel :blush:
Reply
:iconeyeofhavoc:
EyeOfHavoc Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Haha, I bet you're frustrated.
Reply
:iconkane-blackthorn:
Kane-Blackthorn Featured By Owner Apr 7, 2011  Student Writer
You bet...XD
Reply
:iconkarezuzusan:
karezuzusan Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Brilliant!! You are not weird!! You are soo good at writing poetry haha!! :heart:
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